Eight

So, I was thinking.  As I was getting myself ready to head off to a Broadway show this weekend (more to come later about that awesomeness), I started to think.

As a teenager, and a young adult, I used to wear a lot of makeup.  Most of it started up when I hit puberty and my skin flipped overnight to something I was so ashamed of.  Even once it began to clear up a few years later, I still kept caking it on.  It wasn’t to feel pretty, and it wasn’t because I loved playing with it – it was simply to hide.  To hide myself, and to hide everything that I was ashamed of within me.  I became so accustomed to this literal mask I would paint on each day, that eventually I forgot what a farce it truly was and I started to just accept that it was part of who I am.

Last year, I was forced to throw it all out since my skin once again took a nosedive.  I haven’t been able to wear cover up since.  I guess this must be my body’s way of finally pushing me to ‘face the music’ and live my true self.   It hasn’t been easy….but it’s also been an incredible blessing.

Sometimes, it is just exhausting to function in this society.  As a woman, there are so many expectations of who I should be, how I should behave and speak, what I should wear or how I should look…. eventually I grow tired of trying to keep it all straight.  Unfortunately, men are not immune to the stereotypes of our society either.   So, I was thinking.  Why is it that I allow myself to feel less accepted when I choose an outfit like the one outlined in this post?  When it’s not all “glitz and glam”, when it’s comfortable, when I choose not to wear anything on my face?  Why do I allow myself to feel less than I am?  Is this really how society has spun the arrow for us?   To constantly be set in a direction that so many of us can’t follow.  It shouldn’t be about how we are told or made to feel in comparison to the tabloids that we read, but how we actually feel in the presence of those who know us for all of our faults and insecurities, and love us anyway.

There are going to be days that you don’t want to even brush your hair.  You’ll leave your house in sweats… but don’t sweat it.  ROCK the SHIT out of those sweats honey!  There are going to be days that you get all dolled up, even if you have nowhere to go looking so fab (and you KNOW you look so fab that you take 26 selfies just to document that perfect wing).

Both of these days are okay.  In both of these scenarios, you are still as important, and attractive, and valuable.  It’s OKAY to give yourselves a break; in fact I encourage it.  Cut yourselves a little slack.  You’re amazing, and talented, and worthy.   You deserve it.